Sunday Journal Prompt

“As long as you’re giving, you will be receiving.”

 – Deepak Chopra

Holistic health advocate and author Deepak Chopra says he aims to give to everyone he comes into contact with—a prayer, a blessing, laughter, a compliment, something. According to him, “As long as you’re giving, you will be receiving.” We are drawn to those who share their light with us, as it helps recharge us so that we can give energy—in the form of kindness, understanding and love—to others.

One of my earliest memories is one I which I’m sitting with my church preschool classmates, all of us holding up our index fingers and singing “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine.” I recall feeling happy and warm—a deep sense of contentment and awareness. Though I couldn’t have articulated it at age four, learning that I had a light in me that could brighten the lives of others offered me a deep sense of receiving.

 

Whom can you give to today? How can you share your light with others?

 

 

However, for those in one-sided relationships, giving and giving without an exchange can drain us. In those cases, consider limiting your time with the “taker” in your life.

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Writing co-ops very different areas of your brain into the task, so it’s a much more meaningful and deeper exercise when you write.”

 

 - Dr. Guy Winch, author of Emotional First Aid
 

With rejection, our self-esteem gets damaged. While the rejection causes 10-20% of the hit, according to psychologist Guy Winch, our own negative internal voice prolongs the pain. For example, someone who is romantically rejected may have a host of negative thoughts: I'm too this, too that, not enough this, not enough that. To cope with rejection, Winch says we need to remind ourselves what we do bring to the world. He advises us to make a list of our meaningful, important qualities—such as being funny, emotionally available, loyal or great with in-laws. He says to choose one and write a paragraph or two about why it’s important and how we manifest it.

Clients often tell him they did this exercise in their heads, but Winch says “it doesn’t work that way.” He compares it to someone who is hungry who opens the refrigerator and imagines eating the food in it. Afterwards, that person is still going to be hungry. “You actually have to write it down,” he said in a recent The One You Feed podcast episode. “The writing coops very different areas of your brain into the task, so it’s a much more meaningful and deeper exercise when you write.” He says focusing on all the things we have to offer helps us cope with rejection.

 

What rejection are you coping with? Write two paragraphs about what gifts you bring to the world.

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

Smoko - a slang term used on building sites in Australia, meaning a morning-tea break or a smoke break. 

- UrbanDictionary.com
                               

                                
My student Josia, who had studied in Australia, mentioned the term “Smoko” to me, referring to our class breaks in which I provide time for students to scroll through social media feeds (rather than during class time), to go for a brief walk or to get some water. According to the Australian government’s Fair Work Ombudsman, rest breaks are also referred to as “crib breaks,” “rest pauses” or “tea breaks,” as detailed in the employee entitlement section of its guidelines—though Smoko derives from mid-morning cigarette breaks taken during work or military duty.

A University of Illinois study found that the brain’s attentional resources drop after a long period of focusing on a single task, decreasing our focus and hampering performance. Though it’s counterintuitive, breaks boost our performance. While social-media breaks are better than not taking breaks, they are not re-energizing, as Andrew Deutscher, VP of Business Development at The Energy Project and an expert on office productivity, explained to the Huffington Post: “They're not going to be nearly as refreshed and recovered as if they took a real break to walk outside.”

How can you schedule mid-morning and afternoon walks into your day?

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Unlock iPhone, click on app, log food … 150 calories in Honey Bunches of Oats cereal, 30 calories in the vanilla unsweetened almond milk, 100 calories for a piece of 100% whole grain Brownberry bread, 90 calories for a tablespoon of peanut butter, 85 calories for small apple, 0 calories for 10 celery sticks, 140 calories for small packet of ranch dressing. That means in order to stay under my daily calorie goal, I can eat 800 more calories today, so I can have those two slices of pizza. No problem.”      

– Lindsay Moeller, age 21   

In her analysis of Michael Pollen’s The Omnivore’s Dilemma, my student Lindsay wisely opened her term paper with this description of her daily food log. Reading it exhausts me, accomplishing the effect she was going for.

While I didn’t use an app, I used to log what I ate each day in a notebook. It started as a way to determine which foods caused my Crohn’s symptoms, but later I added a section for my weight—since I weighed myself daily—and time spent on the elliptical machine. Not only did this take time to think about and record, but when I was disappointed in my results, the negative voice in my head shamed me—draining my energy.

The name of the app Lindsay used has the word “pal” in it, but to me it wasn’t a friendly encounter. While I know the rush of meeting daily goals, I suspect that thinking this way consumes time and energy that could be better spent on energizing tasks.

When I stopped going to the gym, stopped tracking my food intake, and stopped logging my “progress,” I lost weight, gained muscle and mindfully chose natural foods on a daily basis. I had more time and energy to prepare healthy meals. I no longer weigh myself daily. In fact, I threw away my scale and canceled my gym membership. Instead I practice yoga and meditate at home for 20 minutes daily, and attend gentle exercise classes twice a week with people who have become dear to me.

What’s your relationship with food and exercise? If it drains your energy, how can you mindfully shift gears toward a more nourishing relationship? 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

 “Taking the time to focus on what you are thankful for, letting that sense of gratitude wash over you—this helps us manage and cope.”

– Paul Mills, professor of family medicine and public health at the UCSD School of Medicine

In a study conducted at the University of California San Diego School of Medicine, Professor Paul Mills tested 40 patients and noted biological indications of heart disease such as inflammation and heart rhythm. After that, half of the patients kept a journal most days of the week, writing about two or three things they were grateful for. “People wrote about everything, from appreciating children to being grateful for spouses, friends, pets, travel, jobs and even good food,” reports Patti Neighmond in an NPR article on the study.

Two months later, the journal-keeping patients had lower inflammation levels and improved heart rhythms, resulting in reduced risk for heart disease. Mills believes that journaling about what we’re grateful for reduces stress, which is a huge risk factor in heart disease.

What are you grateful for?

Sunday Journal Prompt

“DECIDE WHAT TO BE AND GO BE IT.”

 

– Written on the side of a building on Broadway in downtown Los Angeles.

 

For years we’ve heard “Just do it” from Nike ads. But the message “Decide what to be and go be it” goes a step further: We get to decide. You get to decide. Other people may have a vision of who you are or who you are expected to be: parents, partners, friends, acquaintances, even children. Yet it’s exhausting to try to be whom we do not want to be. By choosing for ourselves, we breathe new energy into our pursuits. It’s in your hands.

Whom do you want to be?

How can you go be that person?

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Are you on your own team?”

 – Koren Motekaitis, podcaster

 

 

Even when we have a cheer section rooting for us, sometimes we work against ourselves. When a loved one encourages me to take a leap, my voice of doubt often trumps it: I’m not good enough, smart enough, creative enough, _______ enough. I find myself spouting off all the reasons why I can’t and shouldn’t accomplish the thing I want to do.

 

It helps to work toward my goal on a regular basis—to schedule it as a priority rather than let other responsibilities take over. When I let something else consume that time, bitterness and resentment fester—reinforcing my desire to keep my date with myself to work toward what I want. By committing time regularly, I begin to erode the voice of doubt and join my own team.

 

What steps can you take to join your own team?

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Excuses are the bricks that build the house of failure.”

 

– Mrs. Weirich

 

 

Veteran second-grade teacher Mrs. Weirich said this to my son Alex, a gifted boy who had mastered excuses to avoid doing more than the bare minimum. He’s 15 now and still considers Mrs. Weirich his favorite teacher. She was on to him and knew he was capable of more than he was giving.

What excuses are you giving to others or telling yourself? How are they holding you back?

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.”   

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

Often we blame others for our unrest. Have you heard yourself say phrases like these? “She drives me crazy when she _____________.” “I hate it when __________.” “I wish he would _____________.” I’m not saying that what other people do isn’t annoying or frustrating, but we are the ones who determine how we react—externally and internally.

When I don’t take care of myself, my defenses are down. That’s when I’m most likely to get bent out of shape by the behaviors of others. I let external factors alter my sense of peace. But when I go to bed early (which enables me to awaken on my own without an alarm), eat wisely (avoiding sugar and processed food), practice yoga, read inspiring literature, write in my journal and meditate daily, I am fortified. I can better weather life’s annoyances, promoting peace within myself and sharing it with those around me.

 

What’s one way you can promote peace for yourself today?

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

What’s on your ta-da list?

So often our inner voice tells us what we’re doing wrong, what we should’ve done or what we need to do. Let’s counter that by writing a ta-da list. What are you doing well?

The “old Jenny”—the part of me that relied on external validation to define me—would embark on a resume-style list of publicly recognized accomplishments and stop there. Perhaps you start with some of those, especially if they were hard-earned. Then keep going.

Next record what you do for others: making soup for your family, supporting a friend through her divorce, driving carpool for children of parents who work long hours, doing the dishes at your in-laws’ house after a holiday meal.

Finally, write down your inner-life ta-das such as praying, writing in your journal, slowing down to savor a moment such as a cat watching falling snowflakes, giving silent thanks before a meal, making the decision to have patience with someone who frustrates you. These are the things that no one sees overtly. Yet they take time and focus, and contribute to who you are. I encourage you to be especially proud of your invisible ta-das.

Counter negative self-talk with a list of what you’re proud of—the things people see and the things they don’t. Each time that negative voice resurfaces, bring to mind this list.

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“I’ve won the day.”

 

– Tiffany Salter, PhD candidate  

 

After working on her prospectus for her PhD dissertation first thing in the morning, PhD candidate Tiffany Salter said she felt as if she’d won the day. Before letting in other voices through news, social media and email, she worked on her own project for an hour—giving it her full attention and best energy.

What task do you find yourself postponing throughout the day? How can you rearrange your schedule or your priorities to commit to working on it after you wake up—even if you only have ten minutes to devote to it?

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“All men should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.”

– James Thurber

 

 

I view journal writing as a pathway to live out the Greek proverb “Know thyself,” frequently voiced by Socrates in Plato’s writings. Author James Thurber encourages us to reflect on what we’re running from, working toward and, most importantly, why—a sure way to help us better know ourselves.

 

As a creative writing teacher, I asked my students to consider the space between the “experiencing-I” and the “reflective-I” in essays we examined. The first is the person who lives in the moment—the woman who quits her job and hops on a stranger’s motorcycle on a Wednesday afternoon. The second is the older version of herself who reflects back on that moment to make sense of it—to process what she was running from, to consider what she hoped to find, and, of course, to figure out why. It’s in that reflection that we see character growth.

 

What have you been running from?

Where are you headed? Why?

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Be here now.”

- Sam, age 14

My friend’s son Sam has been bored during his English class. When the class read Huckleberry Finn, he was frustrated with how long Huck and Jim stayed on the raft. He constantly looked at the clock, wishing the class would end. However, he realized that looking at it seemed to make the period last longer. “I said to myself,” he explained to his Mom, “that I just need to stop looking at the clock. I just need to be here now.” His mother told him that it takes some adults many, many years to learn that lesson.

Sam’s decision to “Be Here Now” echoes the title of a 1971 book on spirituality, yoga and meditation by the Western-born yogi and spiritual teacher Ram Dass—the name coined from a statement made by his guide Bhagavan Das during Ram Dass’s journeys in India. 

Mentally fighting against “what is” can fuel our anger and frustration. How can you make the most of the moment you’re in—how can you “be here now,” as Sam and Ram Dass advise?

Sunday Journal Prompt

When the Dalai Lama was asked what surprised him most about humanity, he answered, “Man, because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then, he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then, he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die and then dies having never really lived.”

 

When have you pushed yourself so hard that you got sick? What were the consequences of that? What specific steps can you take to avoid this?

Sunday Journal Prompt

“What you seek seeks you.”

 – Rumi  

 

The universe is not out to get us, though it may seem that way at times. In this quote from 13th-century Persian poet, philosopher and theologian Rumi, the Sufi mystic tells us that what we want is what wants us. So what is stopping us from getting what we want? What’s delaying the ability for what we want to find us? Often it’s ourselves.

Is there anything you’re doing or not doing that’s blocking you from getting what you want? Perhaps it’s a counterproductive action or belief. How can you reduce obstacles or shift your beliefs so that what you seek can find you?

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Writing down the energy drainers and boosters helped me see the things I need to cut out of my life.”

– Kaitlyn Ambrose, Ohio State University student

 

We spend time with people and participate in activities daily. Some inspire us, and others drain us. By interacting with them on the page, you’re likely to come to new discoveries.

Make two columns on your page. On the left, list the things that drain your energy—such as tasks, activities and people. (My list includes sugar, lack of sleep and negative people.) On the right, list what gives you energy—tasks, activities and people. (For me, those include laughing with my children and writing in my journal.)

Choose a few items and do a freewrite about them—which means that you keep writing for a few minutes even if you’re not sure what you want to say. Afterwards, answer these questions: How you can spend more time with energy givers and less time with energy drainers? Continue to think about and contribute to this list over the next few days. Keep considering this: What can you do more or less of to regain energy—to stoke the fire within you?

Sunday Journal Prompt

Nature can heal our nature.

A walk in the woods always lifts my mood. According to Japanese religion Shintoism, a divine spirit dwells in all of nature and brings joy and bounty to life—which connects to a positive state of mind. The Japanese practice Shinrin-yoku, “forest bathing,” has been shown to reduce stress, anxiety and blood pressure while raising energy, according to scientists at Chiba University in Japan. And breathing in phytoncides, compounds trees release, may boost our immune system for more than a month, according to an Environmental Health and Preventative Medicine study.

How has being in nature benefited you in the past? What can you do today to benefit from nature’s healing effects?

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“What creative work are you doing that has no goal?” 

 

- Writer and college professor Dr. Kirsten Ogden

During our three-state drive to a writing retreat, my friend Kirsten and I talked about our many projects—books, articles and essays in progress; curriculum changes and new grading strategies we’re working on to improve our teaching; and our business-building ideas linked to promoting the health of others.

Then this dear, long-time friend—who knows how goal-driven I can be—asked me what else I’m doing creatively. What am I creating just for fun? I loved this question and felt myself take a deep, fulfilling breath.

During the past year, I’ve experimented with new recipes, feng shui and glass blowing without expecting results—a rarity for me. I also consider my daily journal writing as creative work without publishing goals. On a recent park outing with two of my nieces, we set up our art supplies in a playhouse where we drew, colored and painted together just for fun.

This playtime has become just as important, if not more important, to who I am and who I am becoming than my resume will ever reveal.

 

What are you creating just for fun?

What would you like to create?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“The time to take the cookies is when they’re being passed.”

 

– Cicely Clark O’Donovan, my grandmother

 

My cousins and I often repeat our grandmother’s words: “The time to take the cookies is when they’re being passed.” In other words, seize the day. Don’t let an opportunity pass you by but rather assert yourself in the moment.

My husband has taught our sons to step up when an opportunity arises. When we visited NBC Studios in Rockefeller Center, the tour guide asked for volunteers when our group entered a mock newsroom. For a split second people looked at each other. Yet before I could even process what we might be in for, my boys, at ages 12 and 14, shot up their hands. “I’ll do it,” Alex shouted. “Me too,” Michael said. They were all in. And I treasure the videos of their mock newscasts, an experience that enriched our trip to New York City. 

I tend to think too much about opportunities that come my way. I ask countless questions to know exactly what to expect. Of course, in some cases, this is a wise move. Before moving four states away, I wanted to know as much as possible about what the new job would entail and what the city had to offer. But other times I know I’d benefit from taking a chance, from taking those cookies when they’re being passed, even if I don’t know exactly what they’re going to taste like.

When have you hesitated and when have you jumped at opportunities?

What were the results?

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.”   

 

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

Often we blame others for our unrest. Have you heard yourself say phrases like these? “He drives me crazy when he _____________.” “I hate it when __________.” “I wish she would _____________.” I’m not saying that what other people do isn’t annoying or frustrating, but we are the ones who determine how we react—externally and internally.

When I don’t take care of myself, my defenses are down. That’s when I’m most likely to get bent out of shape by the behaviors of others. I let external factors alter my sense of peace. But when I go to bed early (which enables me to awaken on my own without an alarm), eat wisely (avoiding sugar and processed food), practice yoga, read inspiring literature, write in my journal and meditate daily, I am fortified. I can better weather life’s annoyances, promoting peace within myself and sharing it with those around me.

What’s one way you can

promote peace for yourself today?

 

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“The strong, calm man is always loved and revered.

He is like a shade-giving tree in a thirsty land or a sheltering rock in a storm.”

– James Allen, English writer

 

This quote describes my husband Robert, who manages stress well and keeps the big picture in mind. He is my rock, my shade tree. My emotions tend to fluctuate, often in response to a temporary crisis. During these times, he offers sound advice that helps ground me. It’s as if he’s lived life before and knows what’s important and what’s not. I’ll admit that while I’m in the midst of some drama, I don’t always want or take his advice. In these cases, I typically see the wisdom of his guidance after the crisis has passed. 

What makes him the way he is? While nature and nurture play a big role, I believe his habits do too. He prays nightly, often expresses gratitude for his blessings, has a deep, unwavering understanding of his priorities, and doesn't commit to more than he's able to take on.

Who is it that offers you stability?

What can you learn from him or her?

 

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

What story are you telling yourself?

 

Often we tell ourselves a story so much that we believe it and live it: I’m not disciplined enough to lose weight, I’m not a good enough wife/mother/daughter/sister/friend, I’m not smart enough.

In a study about personal story editing, researchers gathered 40 college freshman at Duke University who were struggling academically and who felt their intellect was not on par with other students. Those who watched videos of older students who talked about how their grades improved as they adjusted to college not only did better on a sample test, but also boosted their GPAs and were less likely to drop out than those who received no story-changing intervention, as reported in Tara Parker-Pope’s New York Times article, “Writing Your Way to Happiness.”

What’s your self-defeating story?

 

Give yourself a story-changing intervention session by writing down a new story—one in which you will succeed.

 

Sunday Journal Prompt

“An integral being knows without going, sees without looking, and accomplishes without doing.”

 

– Lao Tzu, ancient Chinese poet and philosopher who founded Taoism

One of Deepak Chopra’s spiritual laws of success is the Law of the Least Effort. Embedded in it is the notion of going with the flow without resistance. The daffodil bulbs in my garden automatically rise each spring, and the leaves on my maple trees effortlessly fall in autumn. They don’t strain. So often we try to force something into being—a relationship, a promotion—instead of letting it happen naturally.

 

When we go against our instincts and try to be someone else or live the life that someone else wants us to live, we feel drained. Rather than exerting so much energy to conform or chase power or control, relax your effort to discover harmony, joy and a new level of accomplishment.

On what or from whom can you release your urge for control?

Where in your life can you let things happen naturally rather than forcing something into being?

Sunday Journal Prompt

 “I feel so unburdened.” 

– Swap meet participant

A friend hosts a swap meet at her home each spring. People clear out their closets and bring items to give away—clothes, purses, shoes, perfume, sunglasses. It feels good to part with items we don’t use but haven’t discarded. According to the principles of Feng Shui, every object has energy, and negative energy can be associated with items we have been keeping that make us feel guilty (for instance, a gift we received but never liked or clothes that are too small because we’ve gained weight). Returning home to an edited closet boosted my energy level.

Choose to unburden yourself from something material or emotional. What are you holding onto that you can discard?

Sunday Journal Post

“Decision fatigue helps explain why ordinarily sensible people get angry at colleagues and families, splurge on clothes, buy junk food at the supermarket and can’t resist the dealer’s offer to rustproof their new car.”

– John Tierney in New York Times article “Do You Suffer From Decision Fatigue?”

We have a finite store of mental energy for exerting self-control, according to social psychologist Roy F. Baumeister, who studied mental discipline in a series of experiments at Case Western and Florida State University. When people fended off the temptation to wolf down M&Ms or freshly baked chocolate-chip cookies, they were then less able to resist other temptations. Willpower, Dr. Baumeister asserts, is a form of mental energy that can be exhausted.

His studies show that people with the best self-control arrange their lives to conserve willpower. “They don’t schedule endless back-to-back meetings. They avoid temptations like all-you-can-eat buffets, and they establish habits that eliminate the mental effort of making choices. Instead of deciding every morning whether or not to force themselves to exercise, they set up regular appointments to work out with a friend,” Tierney reports.

Abraham Lincoln ate the same meal for breakfast every day: a hard-boiled egg and a cup of coffee. Steve Jobs is known for his signature black turtleneck. Kurt Vonnegut awoke at 5:30 a.m. and wrote until 8 a.m. each morning. What decisions can you put on autopilot?

How can you adjust your routine to reduce the number of daily decisions you make to conserve your mental energy?